The importance of Play

let's dare to take ourselves more lightly ....

In the northern hemisphere the days are getting shorter. The autumn leaves still play and whirl for a while, but then we move on to colder times, as nature takes a rest from growth. The tide turns towards winter, to endings, and maybe our mind turns to reflections of how this passing year has been for us.

It might seem natural to evaluate the year, or ourselves: have I achieved what I set out to do 12 months back? Have I met my goals, materially ... or spiritually? Have I contributed to the world becoming a better place?

These questions feel heavy, even as I write them. Am I avoiding something, if I do not go down the route of those reflections? I think not, because we can never be caught through evaluation? Society engages a lot in comparison, of some people being seen more or less valuable than others. We might find ourselves in situations where we want to make a good impression, or where someone has a say of what will become of us. Those situations, in my experience, are often filled with fear.

As soon as we evaluate we enter the realm of ideas: I am such a person, with those qualities and faults, and I should be more like this. We compact ourselves into an object, or are treated as an object by other people. Or we see others as objects, some we like, some we don't...

We might have ideas of something we wish we would have done differently last March. This might trouble us, fill our minds with shame or regret. There is the English expression of 'worrying at something', which means to think about a problem, but also 'to pull, twist, or bite (something) repeatedly'. That gives a physical sense of how there is an interaction between subject and object, where the ego-subject cannot let go of a very concrete 'it'.

Yes, it is important to apologise if we have hurt someone. But also, maybe it is more useful to be here. Present, now, with these moments as they arise, all of them light and ungraspable like soap bubbles ... Sometimes a situation seems to open for a while, an opportunity, an invitation, and then it seems like the moment is closing, changing .... can I let my steps be guided, light enough to not make the etherial moment heavy?

Maybe if we are not too weighed down by evaluation or comparison, we can find the steps can be part of the dance, and we can step more lightly, as part of the arising moment. Less weighed down by questions like 'am I ok?', we can play. We will never catch the 'me' - all of us are uncatchable - not the site of evaluation, but the site of becoming fresh, every moment, together with the world that is already dancing with us.

I invite you to join the playful dance of seeming subject and seeming object - never separate and always finding new steps together. Watching the leaves as they whirl and dance on different gusts of wind is a pleasure that reminds me to let myself be carried more by what moves through me.

If you want to dance in company with others there are opportunities coming up, online and in-person. There is an online evening called Take yourself Lightly on the 12th November, and a day retreat called Detox you Heart on the 10th of January (please book ahead for this). Also there is the regular Wednesday morning drop-in meditation. More on all those and some other offers here.

If you might be interested in joining a tour to Ladakh and Zanskar - here is the description and the dates for 2027: Himalayan Valleys

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Wishing you some relaxed weeks, with light steps in all directions.

Image by wayhomestudio on Magnific